Approximation of script:

(Yoga instructor Ashley dressed in yoga wear ready for journey, mic in hand)
Ashley: Hello my name is Ashley and I'm a your yoga instructor tonight. Thank you for coming on this exquisite journey with me. Let's remember yoga is not a competition, it is a personal spiritual journey, which we must travel on. What happens on the yoga mat stays on the mat.

I'd like to share with you some movements I learnt from the Sufis whilst backpacking near by on a yoga retreat a few summers ago. The Sufis taught me so much about the inner self- how to peel away that ragged shell and finding the real you. Lets start by rotating the hips round and round, just look at my actions for now and you too can achieve transcendence through the rotating hip motions.  Next I'd to combine that with some breathing exercises that I learnt whilst travelling around the slums of the Persian peninsula. The incredible people  Breath in 1, 2, 3, 4 out 2, 3, 4 in 2,3,4 out 2,3,4

Cough cough cough 
I'm dying I'm dying, I’m dying
(Falls on the floor, slowly dies)
I'm dead